I want to be able to access my lab when I travel. I currently am running Tailscale. However the transfer speeds are horrible and I feel there are better solutions out there. What would be a great vpn that will also support a future site to site for offsite backups
Tailscale normally facilitates a direct connection between your two systems. In this mode it is really a method of firewall transversal. If that can’t be setup, it has a backup mode where the data is relayed through Tailscale’s servers. It sounds like you are in this backup mode or your upload speed is just slow. Most internet connections are asymmetrical where the upload speed is much less than download.
Using a direct hosted VPN like Wireguard means opening a port on your firewall.